Eric Wolfram's Writing, Pie In The Sky

Pie In The Sky

Gather 'round oh Merry Band
Here's a Story I will tell
About the greatest Banner deal
You all should know it well

One foggy winter morning
At my desk after Y2K
I looked upon a banner ad
I looked twice, I have to say

It's was an ad from Xten
And they started a real big fad
With a wonderful new technology
And a rediculous banner ad

Eye in the Sky video it said
You can place it short or tall
It's a mini wireless camera unit
Which sends an image through the wall

It's a mini video transmitter
For surveillance and spying
Which you could also put in your baby's room
To make sure that she's not crying

It's the product I'd been waiting for
I had only hoped that it existed
Yet according to this banner ad
For sixty dollars it was listed

So with a click I was sent
To a web page promise of so much more
Like a twenty dollar rebate
And free delivery to my door

So I typed my numbers in quicker then flick
And got an email that did say
My Eye in the Sky video camera
Had been shipped to me that day

So here I waited until evening
Composed with cautious restrain
And in the night my camera danced
In my slumbers when I dreamed

And in the morning with the rising sun
Mr. Fedex gave his mighty knock
He handed me my package
I gave my John Hancock

I rushed the package to my desk
And opened it wide eyed
There was a camera, transmitter, and receiver
AND an free gift to my surprise

It's a handy wireless home control kit
For controlling electrical appliance
Now from my computer station
The house hold is at my compliance

Yet xten didn't have my camera
So they sent me a high end version free
With microphones and audio channels
So I can hear as well as see

On top of that, the bill I noticed
There was a big mistake
They forgot to charge me for the camera
But gave the a full rebate

So now they owe me twenty dollars
The gear is mine for free
There's been no bargain like it
Since Adam met with eve

We live in a strange new world now
And my story here is true
Some businesses on this network
Have strange thoughts on revenue

So next time you're at your browser
Checking stocks and clicking around
Remember my tale of banner luck
and the bargain that I found

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